Annual dinner on April 25th NJ Collaborative Practice Group

The New Jersey Council of Collaborative Practice Groups will be holding their annual dinner on April 25th, at Maggiano's Little Italy in Bridgewater from 6pm to 10pm.  The focus will be the New Jersey Family Collaborative Law Act -- where we are now and where we are going.  We are going to begin the program with a panel of our Council leaders who will address where we are now, the importance of the New Jersey Family Collaborative Law Act and how it will benefit all of our professionals.  Valerie Brown, Esq. will then address where we are going and the critical steps to passage of the New Jersey Family Collaborative Law Act.

For whom is Collaborative Divorce the proper process choice?

Collaborative practice ensures the best possible chance for:

• Couples who are seeking to reconfigure their families in a way that protects children, offering their children the best chance to experience the benefits of BOTH parents in an environment of mutual respect and support.
• Better communication between ex-spouses and an opportunity to effectively co-parent. 
• A civil, rational result. 
• An agreement that gives BOTH spouses as much as possible without hurting the other. 
• Protection from the emotional and psychological damage to children and to each other often caused by animus and protracted litigation. 

Collaborative practice is NOT a process for people destined to destroy their families (I have not met one client for whom this is a stated goal) and it most certainly is not for spouses seeking to punish and/or obtain revenge.

What happens if one side or the other decides to play “hide the ball,” or is dishonest in some way, or misuses the Collaborative Divorce process to take advantage of the other party?

That can happen. There are no guarantees that a participant in the Collaborative Divorce process will not act in bad faith; just as there also are no guarantees in the litigation process. But you will be represented by a lawyer who will pay close attention to this issue. If she determines your spouse is being dishonest, she will make sure that both you and your spouse’s attorney know immediately. You can end the process and go to court. Also, the collaborative agreement requires a lawyer to withdraw upon becoming aware that her client is being dishonest, or participating in the process in bad faith. For instance, if documents are altered or withheld, or if a client is deliberately delaying matters for economic or other gain, the lawyers have promised in advance that they will withdraw and will not continue to represent the client. The same is true if the client fails to keep agreements made during the course of negotiations; for instance, an agreement to consult a vocational counselor, or an agreement to engage in joint parenting counseling.

What if my spouse doesn’t cooperate and I want to go to court?

It is important to remember that in signing an agreement to engage in the collaborative process, you do not give up any rights, including the right to go to court. If it becomes apparent that your spouse is not cooperating with the process, and you need the security of court orders, you always have the option to withdraw from the process and engage in litigation – after having retained a new attorney.

Do I need an attorney to represent me if I select the Collaborative Divorce process?

Yes. However, your attorney has a limited scope in representing you. The representation is limited to collaborative negotiations towards reaching a settlement.

During the collaborative divorce process you and your spouse will be individually represented by collaboratively trained family law attorneys. The participants can choose any collaborative divorce attorney from an active collaborative divorce group. There are numerous collaborative divorce groups in the state of New Jersey. Typically, divorcing couples choose collaborative attorneys from the same geographical area in order to minimize travel. After you select an attorney, your attorney will discuss with you in further detail the collaborative divorce process and answer any specific questions that you may have. During this meeting you will receive the information necessary to decide whether the collaborative divorce process is right for you and your situation.

Attached is an interesting article from Cincinnati Divorce Attorney Maury White

INTERESTS VERSUS POSITIONS

Is a Collaborative Divorce less costly than a traditional divorce?

I like to think of the cost of a divorce in terms of financial and emotional cost. Usually, a collaborative divorce will be less expensive financially because you are not paying an attorney for multiple court appearances. When there are multiple team members involved, the actual financial cost may not be substantially less. However, there is no question that in the collaborative process, the emotional cost – for both you, your spouse, and your family – is substantially less.